A Call
to Brotherhood
-by
Brother Rey Regan A. Gatdula, C. Ss. R
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| Brother Rey Regan Gatdula, C. Ss.R. |
God calls us in different ways. In my
case, it was the orientation in my childhood life. When I was a child, my
parents used to bring me to church on Sundays. Every night we would say the
rosary and on Wednesdays we would attend the novena to OMPH. In addition, my
grandparents, particularly my grandfather was so religious. It was his faith
which influenced mine. At the age of 13, I actively participated in the various
religious programs- Oasis of Love and
Divine Mercy Movement in our barangay and Legion of Mary in our school. At the
same time, my parents used to bring me to the prayer meetings of El Shaddai in
our parish and even in Luneta. These involvement in different religious
organizations increased my desire to become a priest.
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| Brother Regan during his regency |
But later on, my dream to become a
priest receded when I started to fall in love and had girlfriends. My peers and
classmates influenced my dreams. I remember one of them saying that it is not
normal for a young boy like me to dream on becoming a priest. Because of that I
started dreaming of having a family someday, to work, and live abroad. I
continued my journey with this new ideology in my mind.
I consider it a turning point in my
life when my father died during my second year in college. My father’s death
made me reflect about my life. Where I would go. What I really wanted to do. I
started to look for a support group that would help me see what life is in
stored for me. I felt clueless and helpless.
Until one day, our then SK president invited
me to attend a Christian Life Program of Singles for Christ. I did not know
much about Singles for Christ at that time. Out of curiosity, I went and joined
the CLP. I found it interesting because of two things, the free snacks and beautiful
sisters. However, during the one to one dialogue after the first module, I became
really attracted in the community and it brought back my faith.
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| Brother Regan with SFC North Sector |
After college, I decided to have a
work experience first before entering the seminary. I worked in a
multi-national company and was earning more than enough for my family’s needs. But
there was still an emptiness within me and that void was something I need to
fill. When I heard about the Search In program of the Redemptorist in Lipa, in
no time did I join and through this program I met a religious Brother who introduced
to me the beautiful vocation of being a Brother. During this time, SFC assisted
me in my discernment. I could not forget how our SFC leaders prayed for me and
accompanied me in my discernment. They were my source of strength and hope. Being
very supportive to my vocation is an understatement.
After a year of discernment I
eventually entered the seminary. It was a huge and very difficult decision to
make. I had to consider my family, my work and my SFC service. It was indeed a
heart splitting decision. I was clueless on what would happen to me. It was a
big adjustment in my prayer life. In the seminary, there was no raising of
hands, praising nor clapping during group prayers. Instead, we prayed very
solemnly. Needless to say I missed the SFC community and its activities. I
really struggled.
I remembered when I was in Laoag,
Ilocos Norte during my first assignment. I met a group of Handmaids of the Lord and became
very close to them. There was a time that I joined their household meeting because
I knew they would be having praise and worship (and mouthwatering snacks, too).
And that helped me to feel at home. Those women were great and I thank and
bless them.
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| During an SFC International Conference |
As a seminarian, I still had to battle
with my own desires. I could not eat in fast food chains or buy whatever I want,
like I used to. When I got sick, nobody would be there to take care of me.
Loneliness was extreme. I felt alone. There were times that I really wanted to
go home. Sometimes, I would cry at night. I had to deal with the same struggles
day in and day out. The most troubling part
happened during my third year in the seminary when I found myself crying after
a couple with a child entered and seated in front of me. On that moment, the
desire of having my own family became so deep and intense as I looked at the
father carrying his son. I had a dialogue with a priest and we deemed it
necessary for me to take a break. I applied for two years regency.
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| Bro Regan now enjoys the brotherhood he has |
I had a hard time outside the seminary
especially in looking for a job. The SFC community helped me to adjust. I felt
awkward at first because there were only few old members but the new members’
warm welcome and love revived me. SFC once again became my source of strength,
nourishment, and hope. I became an active member again and became a unit head not
long enough. After sometime, I found myself working as an instructor in
college. My work became my enjoyment. While working, I continue to discern and
think of my vocation. My friends from Couples for Christ became very
instrumental in helping me see the beauty of having a family through their joys,
struggles, challenges and experiences in their family life. I became open to my
desires of having my own family. But I knew I was being called otherwise. I
missed the missions, being with the people, the communities and the prayer life
that I had in the seminary. After two years outside the seminary, I asked again
for graces that I needed to choose which road to traverse. Ultimately, amidst
the chaos inside my heart. I went back in the seminary to become a Brother.
This time I felt God and His great love as He made it less difficult for me to
let go of what I considered essential in the outside world- my work, my family,
and my community. Love is sweeter the second time around as they say.
Now, I am doing theology here in
Davao. I still miss SFC activities like the conferences and the CLPs. I miss my
family and my work before. However, I am enjoying my apostolate to the higher
level. Every weekend, I stay in a certain community and once a month, with the
indigenous people. I really love being with God’s people. I learn a lot of things
from them and my faith grows daily because of them. I have only one prayer in
my life- to become more faithful to my God, my Love and my All. Amen.
Bro. Rey Regan
Gatudula, C.Ss.R., or Kuya Regan to many, is
a newly professed member of the Congregation of the Most Holy Redeemer,
Redemptorists. He made his First Professional Vow as a Brother on May 5, 2012
at the Redemptorist Church Lipa City. He
is currently assigned in Davao as a Theology student. He is 29 years old and
the youngest in their family. He has three siblings. His lovely mother is a widow
and residing in their house in Tanauan, Batangas. He is a graduate of BS in
Entrepreneurial Management. He plans to study sign language next semester which he
will use in his apostolate with the deaf and mute. He has been an active member of SFC since October 2001 and
will always be one.
